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Monday, May 10, 2010

Five for Ten: Supergirl

As a newbie to blogging, I am extremely excited to be a part of Momalom's Five for Ten.  The topic for Day 1 is Courage, and the first thing that came to mind when I read it was my daughter and what a courageous little girl she is.  So, here goes nothing! 


 This is a post about courage. Bravery. Will.  It is a post about my daughter.

Miss M is five years old. She is a bright, beautiful, witty and charming little girl. She loves to run and play and make new friends. She doesn't let anything stop her. Not even her disability.

When I was pregnant with Miss M, it had been almost seven years since my last pregnancy and it was a totally different experience. For one, I wasn't nauseous for nine straight months like I was the last time. Everything went very smoothly and I felt great. I was having my girl. I was so happy to be having a girl. We had her name picked out before we even booked the first ultrasound. I just knew it was a girl and I couldn't wait to meet my daughter.

Miss M was a large baby (10 lbs, 5 oz) and also in a breech position, so she was delivered by c-section (thankfully!). Everything went fairly well and she was such a beautiful little baby (I'm not biased or anything)! She had inhaled fluid so we only got a glimpse of her before she was swept away to intensive care. In all of the chaos and excitement, we didn't notice her feet.

Her feet were deformed. They were turned in and almost bent in half (from toes to heel). She held her legs straight up to her head, just like the position she had in the womb. The doctors did not know what was wrong and sent her for multiple tests over the following weeks, including CT scans, blood tests, MRI and x-rays. To make a long story short, she was finally diagnosed with a condition called Amyoplasia Congenita, a form of Arthogryposis. It basically means that she has no muscle in the lower legs. One of the symptoms of this condition is clubbed feet.

At only a few days old, she started treatments of weekly casting where they slowly moved her feet and put new casts on each week to hold them. This lasted several months. Then at six months, she underwent a heel cord release surgery to prevent her toes from pointing downward. She went to physio. She had to get special braces called ankle-foot orthoses (AFOs) that she must wear everyday to keep her feet in the correct position.

With her AFOs, she learned to walk at 15 months. She was able to wear extra wide running shoes over her AFOs and soon she was running around everywhere.

As she grew, she was fitted for several newer and bigger AFOs. Last year she had another surgery on one foot that was less straight than the other and had to spend six weeks in a cast. It was difficult for all of us to have her in a wheelchair for six weeks. Here was our active little girl stuck in a chair and unable to run around. She rarely complained, but boy was she happy once that cast came off! This year, we realized that the surgery had been unsuccessful and the doctors decided to put her through more casting treatments. Which meant that she would get a new cast on her foot each week for 6-8 weeks. Not fun for a five-year-old.

But has any of this stopped Miss M? Not for a second. She is so strong. We rented a wheelchair for her and we also got crutches for her to try. She learned very quickly how to walk with them. If she can't get somewhere fast enough, she just gets down and crawls. She is not a shy little girl, especially not with other children. She is very outgoing and goes out of her way to meet new kids when she can because she just loves to play and share.  I wish I would have been that way as a child, but I was much too shy.  I still am.  It is still not easy for me to make friends.  But Miss M does it with ease.

Miss M is courageous. She knows that she is different, but she's not afraid of it. If another child asks what those things on her feet are, she tells them that she has special feet and the braces help to keep them straight. She has a disability but it doesn't stop her from doing anything that she wants to do. She finds a way. She may only be five, but she knows that she is special. She knows that the other kids at daycare are not wearing AFOs or going through surgeries. And if she is afraid that she won't be able to keep up, that her classmates won't want to play with her, that new friends won’t accept her… she faces that fear by letting her bright personality shine through.

I hope that she does not lose her courage with age. I know that school-age children can be mean and don’t understand how their words can affect a child's self-esteem. I hope that she will keep that inner strength when she starts school in September. I hope she will continue to face any fear, uncertainty or pain and just keep on shining.

My daughter is the sweetest little girl in the world and I love her so much. I wish I had just a fraction of her bravery, will and determination.  She is my hero.

34 comments:

  1. Shannon! So very very lovely. What an amazing tribute to such a beautiful little girl! You should tell her this in a way that she can understand, how proud you are of her bravery. I'm sure she would love it!

    Also, I think you are very brave, brave for everything you've had to go through since her birth. She might be your hero, but I'm certain you are hers. It's not easy to cope with everything on your end too, but you've done so with grace and your own determination.

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  2. Aw, thanks Christine! That means a lot.

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  3. Miss M is very courageous and special. I am amazed when I read about all she (and you) has gone through since birth!

    Like Christine, I applaud your bravery as well.

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  4. Thanks Amber, she is definitely special. We are so blessed to have two strong, beautiful, caring children in our lives.

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  5. We try to teach our kids so much, but sometimes, it is they who teach and inspire us. Your daughter is so amazing - but it seems like she is courageous because you are too.

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  6. Miss M is so very special! Think of the courage she is showing not only to you, but her classmates and teachers!

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  7. I hope I am showing her strength and courage.

    No doubt that her teachers are impressed by her. And she makes the children who are shy feel more comfortable. She's awesome.

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  8. I am always amazed at the courage young children muster. It's unbelievable what we can learn from them. If I only had half the courage of your daughter I'm certain I could conquer anything! And you know, Shannon, she never would have the strength to move ahead with such happiness and courage if it weren't for YOU. You have been her inspiration I'm sure.

    Such a great, inspiring post Shannon - thank you!

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  9. Oh my to find you through Momalom! WOW. I have a 13 almost 14 year old with severe deformity of his left leg. He has a condition called Trevor's disease...he gets multiple bone tumors (benign) in his left leg. We have tried many surgeries...all unsuccessful. He can't move his knee or his ankle and his foot is severely deformed. But, nothing stops him. He wakeboards and skiis. He fences...just qualified for nationals.

    These kids of ours are amazing. They teach me courage. i wrote a bit about him today as well.

    I always worried about what middle school would bring--but he is just ending 8th grade and he is more resilient than his classmates and more or an individual. He doesn't seem to mind when others ask him about his huge shoe(His left leg is much shorter than his right)

    The surgeries are the worst part. I lost my courage outside the operation room a long time ago.

    I'm so sorry for you--but not your daughter because I know she'll be great!

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  10. That is really beautiful and inspiring. True courage. I am sure you have played a major role in her bravery.

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  11. shannon, hello and thanks for the comment on my post. i have to agree with christine--you ARE brave. probably because you had to be for your daughter at first but now because you just are. raising a child with a difference takes very special parents. it sounds like you are doing a fantastic job at showing your daughter that her possibilities in the world are endless! thanks for sharing. :)

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  12. Little ones teach us so much. Great post on courage!

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  13. That is so wonderful! I love that your daughter is so amazing and outgoing because of your love for her.

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  14. Christine's comment was perfect: Your daughter's courage is admirable, and so is yours. I have a feeling that girl of yours will not lose her spunk to grade school or adolescence, which will be no match that kind of bravery.

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  15. What a great photo -- you clearly are teaching her how to be herself. Nice job, Momma!

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  16. She sounds like a truly remarkable little girl.

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  17. What an inspiring little girl you have! (And so CUTE to boot!) She is truly lucky to have you as her mommy - someone who I am sure has had to put on a brave face and show courage while inside scared to death of another surgery.

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  18. Miss M learned to be brave by watchind someone. She learned courage from watching you, Mom. You are both very courageous.

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  19. Wow, thanks everyone! I feel the love!
    It's true that it hasn't been easy for anyone in my family, but I never really thought of MYSELF as courageous... until reading all of these wonderful posts about courage through Five for Ten. So many people discussed the courageous acts of parenthood, and I have to agree. Parenthood is all about being selfless, strong, courageous, determined. And hopefully we pass those qualities along to our children, too.
    I'm looking forward to visiting some more blogs that I haven't commented on yet. This Five for Ten is amazing!

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  20. This is such a beautiful post and such a great tribute to your daughter. I'm sure you tell her you love her often, but if she ever doubts you, she should just read this. And if you don't think of yourself as a blogger, you should. Join the club! I just started in January and it has been so the rewarding. Keep at it!

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  21. Your daughter is beautiful and truly amazing. It's so inspiring to hear how she approaches life with so much energy. It sounds like nothing will keep this girl down. What a courageous and giftd little girl.

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  22. What a plucky little girl - it's amazing, isn't it, how these babies of ours just push on with such grace and blithe determination. They haven't yet learned those debilitating words "can't" and "shouldn't" - and I join you in praying Miss M never does!

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  23. I never cease to be amazed by the courage and strength of young children. They are built TOUGH, aren't they?! Your daughter sounds like a beautiful little girl, and I think that as long as you continue to support her outgoing personality--and continue to remind her how strong and courageous she is--she'll keep her resilience for a lifetime.

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  24. Kids are so resilient - we should all take a lesson in the courage of your daughter!

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  25. Wow. What an amazing post from a "non-blogger." We have a lot in common...me being a mom without a blog who blogs and you being a non-blogger who blogs. :-)

    Your daughter is just inspiring. That smile on her face says it all. It blows my mind how much we learn from our kids....I mean, who really are the wise ones, you know?

    Thank you so much for stopping by my blog today and I hope this is the beginning of a mellow bloggy friendship!!

    :-)

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  26. I think both you and your daughter are courageous.

    What a beautiful post and a fabulous lesson.

    Thank you.

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  27. Oh, I have goosebumps reading this. You ARE courageous, just by being her mom. By learning what it takes to give her all of the opportunities she has had. By standing beside her and being her cheering section. You are courageous for letting her courage be her own. This is so powerful, really!

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  28. Beautiful Post. I love how children just get things. They don't cover up, they embrace who they are and don't engage in pretense. We all can learn so much from them. I think your daughter is courageous and I know she gets some of that from her Mom.

    Glad to meet you through Momalom.

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  29. Wonderful post! Your daughter is amazing. So are you!

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  30. You are so courageous - where do you think she gained this inner strength from! Thank you for sharing this wonderful glimpse into your life and the life of your daughter.

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  31. Miss is both beautiful and courageous. You are courageous as well. I believe her strength, determination, and courage will take her far. Children can be mean, but they are also very accepting. My nephew has Cerebral Palsy and had a difficult time physically...some kids were cruel but compassionate children far surpassed the mean ones. I know you are very proud and should be of Miss M. That kid rocks!

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  32. Beautiful words. Beautiful little girl. Courage steams from this post. Thank you for sharing this with us. And welcome to blogging! I am sure you will see - and soon - how supportive and scintillating this world can be.

    Thrilled to have found my way here via the lovely sisters at Momalom!

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  33. I am so moved by this. She sounds incredible. I wish we could all hang on to that spirit and that openness. I'm sure it is hard and that there will be times ahead that are even more challenging, but it sounds like both you and your girl have the spirit to plow forward.

    Really, thank you for sharing this. She sounds incredible.

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  34. Made me cry! (of course)

    Thanks so much for sharing... I sure hope that Little Lady will be as brave, strong and courageous as Miss M.

    I am so glad that I found you!

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